Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The Empty Nest

It is tough find words to describe this situation referred to as "the empty nest". How can something feel so bad and so good all at the same time!
THE BAD:
Our nest is empty again. It is very quiet here. I do not anticipate the sound of the door opening, or music coming from downstairs. Our oldest left Sunday after spending two weeks at home. She was here for valuable rest and relaxation before starting the rigor of PA school. It was nice to have her home again. Our family seemed complete.
Today, my husband is helping our youngest daughter move into her dorm for her 2nd year of college. She lived here this summer, and it was wonderful to have her home again. I hope that she, too, got some rest and relaxation before returning to her studies.

THE GOOD:
While missing them is hard, I would never wish that they didn't grow up and leave home. After all, the goal of parenting is to raise them to be independent young adults, able to function, to succeed in our world.

I do not know the exact moment when I realized this, but our girls are no longer girls, they are beautiful young women. I am so proud of them. They had the courage and determination to make their way out into the world. They not only left home, they moved out of state! They have made new friends, chosen their life path, found employment, managed their finances, decorated their living spaces, and made life altering decisions. I can't wait to see what the next "chapter" brings!
MESSAGE TO PARENTS:
If you have children at home, back away from your computer! Seek them out, find out what they are doing. Find something you can do together. Spend this valuable time with them. Even if you just go for a walk, make dinner, fold laundry, play a board game, talk about homework, shop for school supplies, or read a book, those precious minutes will make memories.

16 comments:

BeadedTail said...

Wonderful post! And great advice to parents and to those of us that only have furbabies! Spending time with loved ones should be the most important thing on our "to do" lists.

MySweetThree said...

I am, honest to goodness, still crying over this post. I look at your girls..and I catch a glimpse of my girl's future. Your girls appear confident and happy, and they are beautiful, by the way! I could only hope that I am setting a solid foundation for my 2 girls as you did for yours. My girls are fast asleep...by 7:30 each night. I'm going to go plant kisses on their sweet sleeping cheeks. (Sorry for the rant...your post just really touched me) Good night.

jenscloset said...

I will be experiencing the empty nest in a few years..how the heck did they grow up so quick!?

terryann said...

nice, and yes one more year and both of my girls will be out too!

Kristen said...

They are beautiful! Sounds like you and your husband did a great job :)
My youngest starts Kindergarten in a week, but if feels like she'll be going off to College :(
That's gonna be a long day for me!

Rosebud Collection said...

What a true blog..You are right, they have to walk their path, no matter how hard on us..We still feel the loss and all five are married. They are all in state, but not near by..so we still don't see them that much.

Jenny said...

Aww... Such a conflicting emotional time! Hope things get easier.. if that's even possible!

Catherine Holman said...

Thanks for visiting my blog! We are empty nesters this year too. Our son got his first apartment and will be finishing up his master's degree. Our daughter is 7years older and has been on her own for several years. I miss their voices in the house!
Catherine

hubiehubes said...

I'll look after Emily for you Mrs. Geffre, you have my word! Love your blog by the way. I check for updates as often as I do my email!

Jane Grafton said...

great post! I just included a section today in the book about getting off the computer (my daughter is in bed@) and getting off the cell phones and listen to and talk with your kids!

See you're from SD...I grew up in Minnesota...near Mankato.

MudRailFence said...

Congrats, on raising good kids!

The"message to parents"..I say, hear! hear! :0)

I can't even imagine the day...ug.

Have a good one!

Namaste'...

Paulette

A Blond And A Torch said...

What a moving post!

My son is 11 and I am already dreading his leaving :(

Suzanne said...

So glad that you stopped by my blog today (Just Another Hang Up)! We are at the same stage of life. I can relate to the both sides of being empty nesters! It's sometimes a little lonely, but it is wonderful to see your children making great decisions and doing well.

simple~needs said...

wonderful post!! i am adding you on my blog roll too!!

artsyclay said...

Thanks for visiting my blog! What BEAUTIFUL daughters you have! Your good and bad reflections are so true. I love the feather in the nest picture to show they leave a little bit of their hearts behind.

I've been through the empty nest experience with my 3 older sons and remember crying a lot as each one left for college, and am remarried with a step-son who's a senior in high school, so we'll be going through it again soon. In a way I can't wait, and in a way I'm dreading it.

Linda said...

Well said! When I was running the preschool and even now, parents of younger kids say to me "how can you stand that your kids are grown and not living at home?". We LOVE being empty nesters! Our youngest ididn't move out until she was 26 - it's was time!! LOL But we are so glad they both live close by so we see them often. That helps a lot.